


Re:Zero Future

by Ricard5098



Category: Re:ゼロから始める異世界生活 | Re:Zero Starting Life in Another World (Anime)
Genre: 16 year of Emilia and Subaru, Chochorina and Keid are my children, F/M, WN/LN Spoilers, Wholesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 20:13:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28836861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ricard5098/pseuds/Ricard5098
Summary: A future where Emilia and Subaru have kids. Takes place 16 years after the events of arc 6.
Relationships: Emilia/Natsuki Subaru
Comments: 4
Kudos: 61





	1. A Future

**Author's Note:**

> Finally posted this story here. Now if you have a prefence both FF and AO3 are available to you now.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Subaru and Emilia have kids.

Natsuki Subaru woke up to his daily routine ever since coming to the Roswaal Mansion. Ever since he got transported from his world, he never expected to have this kind of life. If he was ever presented with the choice to go back to his own world again, he knew he wouldn’t. He had many things to keep him here, one of them was a beautiful half-elf. Natsuki Emilia was the person who saved him when he first arrived in Lugnica. The two would always find themselves trouble the day they met. But if one thing remained consistent, the two would always handle the situation together. In this case, together they’ll have to come into agreement that Emilia should let go of Subaru in the morning if he wants to get up. While it was early in the morning, Subaru was always busy helping around the mansion even if he wasn't a butler anymore. 

"Come on Emilia-tan let go...", silently spoke Subaru as he tried to wiggle his way out of Emilia's arms. Truth be told he should have at least gotten better at escaping her but even in her sleep she's freakishly strong. While compared to the beginning it was much harder to escape, but with time he did have a few tricks to release himself. 

But today wasn't his day, she was holding onto him harder compared to most days. Usually, Emilia wraps her arms around the boy but there were times when she wrapped her entire body at Subaru, making him her stuffed animal. There were really a couple of things Subaru could do in this situation. Either wake up Emilia and have her pout at him angrily which would be adorable but troublesome or wait for another century for her to wake up. 

"I really don't have a choice do I," the boy exhaled as he wasn't left with much options. Subaru carefully nudges the sleeping beauty as little as possible to wake her up. A couple of minutes pass and Emilia is somewhat awake. 

"Hmmmmm...what is it Subaru…" 

"I need to get up and start helping out Ram and the others right about now," Subaru explained to the half-awake princess. 

"You don't need to. Today you can sleep a little longer," as the half elf said while rubbing her amethyst eyes. 

"As much as I would want to do that, I don't think Keid and Chochorina would wake up if I don't do something". 

Keid and Chochorina were the children of Natsuki Subaru and Natsuki Emilia. Chochorina was their 12-year-old daughter, while resembling Emilia she was more like Subaru especially with the sharp looking eyes. Chochorina was always filled with energy and pretty much feared nothing except for her mother of course. While Keid was shy and lacked confidence, he was extremely energetic at times and had a passion for the things he enjoyed like listening to his father’s stories. Keid was 9 years old and resembled Subaru more except for the hair color being a mix of both his parents and his eyes looking a lot like Emilia's. It was still obvious that the two were elves but they were quarter elves if you didn't know their lineage. 

"Let them sleep a little longer, they're just kids and kids need lots of sleep," grumbled Emilia as she was falling back asleep again. 

"Fine but could you let me out of bed? I don't want Ram lecturing me," Subaru pleaded as he didn't want to deal with a bitchy demon early in the morning. 

Without saying a word Emilia let go and Subaru made sure to let Emilia rest a bit more than usual. Subaru got dressed and kissed Emilia on the forehead before heading out. As he silently closed the door behind him, he checked upon Keid and Chochorina's room. He opened the door as silently as possible and with that he could see both of Chochorina and Keid hugging Beatrice in bed. 

Subaru smiled at the sight and closed the door to avoid waking them up. As he was walking down the halls Subaru couldn't help but remember memories about those three. There were days when Beatrice only came to Subaru because he would die of mana poisoning if she didn’t. Now most of her days are spent with the children since she's grown extremely affectionate towards them. In the beginning Subaru couldn't help but feel a little jealous but, in the end, he was happy someone was watching over them. 

As the boy was reminiscing, he walked into the kitchen to find Ram and Rem. "Morning, you two sleep well?" Subaru asked the two maids a simple question and what did he get? 

"I was resting very well until I got reminded of your very existence." Yeah, nothing changed between the two. Which Subaru couldn’t help but be happy about since that's the only thing that hasn't changed in the last 17 years. 

"Ignore my sister's words Subaru-kun she slept very well, as for I also slept very nicely." As Rem informed Subaru of her status, he thought about how she never gained her memories ever since she woke up. 

There were days when Subaru couldn't even face Rem since it wasn't the Rem he remembered. He failed as her Hero. No one could deny him that. He died again and again to save his loved ones and he couldn't do nothing but watch the Rem he knew fade away before his eyes. It took Subaru a couple of years to come to terms with the loss of Rem, but with time he managed to accept this new Rem. She wasn't different to how she was before but it felt like he was seeing someone else entirely. 

Before Subaru could trap himself in a cage of wavering thoughts, he noticed something. 

"Where is Frederica and Petra?" Typically, in the morning he would see Petra greet him down the halls and see Frederica drinking tea with the Demon maids. He found it strange that Petra wasn't there to greet him. 

"We're running low on rations so the two decided to head out." Explained the blue haired maid. Subaru was wondering what the hell he was going to do since Frederica and Rem were the ones who always knew the state of the mansion. 

"Maybe I should have stayed in bed after all." Emilia did tell him to rest a bit more. 

Since the two were drinking tea they didn't have much to do if Rem was also there. Even without her memories Rem still was the better maid so if Rem was relaxing that was because there was nothing to do. So, Subaru decided to head back to bed to only have Emilia, 'I told you so'. 

Before he would head back, he decided to grab some mayonnaise since he was feeling pretty empty. As he opened the cabinet to where the mayo was stored, he realized it wasn't there. 

"For fuck sake…" Subaru knew where they were and he was hoping he'd catch her at the scene of the crime. 

He quickly ran to where the kids were at as he was hoping there was still some left for him. As he reaches their room, he creaks open the door to see Chochorina having a mess of mayonnaise across her face. 

"Hey rat, that doesn't belong to you does it?" Subaru announced his presence to the silver haired child. Chochorina gained Subaru's love for mayonnaise and it was unclear who loved it more at times. She had a habit of getting out of bed at night to steal some food, especially mayonnaise. 

As soon as Chochorina heard her father call her out it was no use. She couldn't fight back, yeah, she could kick his ass but if her mother walked in her life would end where it's at. 

"Pleaaaase a little bit more. I'm almost done." As she desperately tried, she hoped to at least finish the rest of the mayo, but Subaru wasn't letting that happen. 

"Sorry Rina but we just made that mayo yesterday and we have nothing to eat for now so hands up." 

"Hmmmm fine. But can I go and play with Patrasche?" The quarter elf was always asking if she could see the earth dragon. 

"Fine but first fix your mess. You don't want your mom seeing this do you?" Chochorina agreed and quickly wiped away the mayo all over her face. Once she did, she jumped off of bed and changed her clothing to go play with the black dragon and ran past Subaru at such a speed he questioned how he even managed with her for the past 12 years. 

Both Subaru and Emilia loved Chochorina at first sight. Subaru wanted nothing but happiness for his child and to keep his family safe from the world. Emilia was in tears as she stared at a beautiful quarter-elf. So many thoughts came to her head that she couldn't stop being reminded of Fortuna when she laid eyes on her. While both Subaru and Emilia were in tears, they were in tears for separate reasons. Emilia for joy and Subaru for pain. 

During the process of giving birth, Emilia was in pain and of course Subaru was there to support her through the process. There was one thing Subaru didn't take into consideration, Emilia's monstrous strength crushed the poor boy's hand. While Emilia was busy cherishing the birth of her daughter, Subaru was mourning the death of his left hand. A couple of days after Chochorina was born, Subaru decided to visit Crusch as he needed Felix to fix his hand for him. 

Things were different when it came to Keid. When Keid was about to be born Emilia was fully prepared to endure it but Subaru had the bright idea of using Cor Leonis while Emilia was giving birth. 

"How bad could it be?" Those were the words Subaru wondered before activating Cor Leonis. He wanted to die. More than anything he wanted to die right there and then. To Subaru it felt as he was giving birth as well but the place it was coming from hurt a lot more then he planned. He wasn't taking all of the pain but only about half to help Emilia through the process. Only with half the pain it brought back terrible memories when he was devoured alive by the Great Rabbit. The Great Rabbit was far and above the worst thing that he ever felt, but this was definitely the second. 

Nothing but bad memories were brought upon when thinking back to the births of his children. He was happy of course but it would have been better if it was a painless process. As he walked down the hall, he looked out the window to see Chochorina playing with Patrasche. Soon he watched as Chochorina and Patrasche rode off to the distance until they weren't visible. Subaru could do nothing but smile at the sight he just watched. 

Finally, after getting up for no reason he arrived at his room. He walked in to see a sleeping angel taking up all the space. Honestly even after 17 years since they first met Emilia was still as clumsy as ever. Back then Emilia was so oblivious to how love worked it took her almost 2 years for her to figure out her feelings for Subaru. During the events of Pleiades tower, Subaru lost his memories and many obstacles were formed. Emilia and Beatrice did their best to comfort Subaru when he lost his memories. There was one thing they could never help out with and that was Return By Death. Subaru was thrown into the depths of hell from the beginning and was almost lost due to his insanity. 

Thankfully Emilia saved him during a failed loop but that managed to put Subaru back into the mindset that he needed to be in. Both versions of Subaru were saved by Emilia and fell in love with her but only Emilia will never know she saved him. In the end Subaru gained his memories and formed a plan to conquer the tower. 

All gluttonies were killed and some people woke up with everything restored and for some it was already too late. In Rem's case only her name was restored. As for Crusch, she managed to gain her memories. A couple of months passed after that and that was around the time when Emilia became very flustered around Subaru. For someone who constantly hit on her he never picked up the signals and didn't want to confuse them for her kind nature. 

With time Emilia confessed her feelings and finally, Subaru was the happiest man in the world. Almost two years of death just to hear her make a confession was simple enough for Subaru. He was a man that only wanted what he wanted and he meant that. The moment he fell in love with Emilia and confessed his feelings he was willing to wait as long as it took for her to give him any answer and, in that moment, nothing could take away his happiness, not even Return By Death. 

"God she’s so fucking gorgeous." As Subaru walked back to the bed, he noticed her awake, staring back with a smile with a blush on her face. Shit he just said that out loud. 

"You know Subaru, you can just tell me you love me you know." Emilia tapped onto the bed inviting Subaru to join her. 

"If you're asking for another kid, I'll pass. I don't want to deal with another potential Rina." 

"You know sometimes I don't know why you hate Puck at times, you call your own daughter Rina when he calls me Lia," called out Emilia. 

"Look he left an impact okay. Puck is still a pretty bad father." The boy tried to defend himself as Emilia continued to call out Subaru. 

"If you reaaaaally didn't like him as a father then you would have told Chochorina how babies are actually made by now," giggled Emilia. 

Subaru explained that, "Look it's much harder to tell her how it actually works, why don't you tell her it should be YOUR job to inform her." As much as Puck was a terrible father, he couldn't call him out on not telling Emilia how babies are made. There was a time when the question came up but Subaru just told Chochorina that she wasn't old enough yet. It was still better than saying that kisses would make babies. 

"Well, I'll tell her when the topic comes back up again. But you seem really tired with just two kids. You were reaaaaaaally excited when we discussing if we wanted kids or not.” 

"Look I was... never mind it’ll be too hard to explain. But raising a kid is much harder than it looks like, especially two." As much as he wanted a big happy family that was too much for Natsuki Subaru. He could barely keep up with Chochorina and Keid as it is and anymore will kill him permanently. 

Emilia moved her position as Subaru went back to bed, "Well we're both happy with the family we have. I just wish Fortuna and Juice would be around. They would have made amazing grandparents." 

"Fortuna, I bet but I'm still a little iffy on Juice. I know you told me that he went insane but the Juice you know is a different Juice I know." 

Subaru couldn't help but bring that fact up. During their years together, Emilia and Subaru talked about Petelguese before and what he became of. The news was something neither Emilia and Subaru knew about. Subaru heard Emilia talk about Juice but never asked anything of it to avoid terrible memories, Emilia on the other hand never knew of Petelgueses fate. Eventually the two told each other everything they knew about the topic and while Subaru had a hard time believing Petelguese, the guy who twisted Rem right in front of him and caused him the most trauma in the worst mindset possible was also Emilia's father figure. Much to his dismiss he had to come to terms with it even if he couldn’t believe it. But he trusted Emilia so that must have meant that he was a pretty good guy, right? 

"Anyway, I'm going to check on Keid and Chochorina wanna come with me?" Emilia got up as if this was what she was awake for. 

"So, you invite me to bed and you want me to get right back up? I think I'll pass but Rina is awake and she's busy riding Patrasche." 

Emilia gave Subaru a wry look. "It's too early for her to be playing with Patrasche, she hasn't even eaten yet," Emilia explained her concerns. 

"Well, she ate mayonnaise so she did eat technically." While giving a stupid response Emilia stared at him with a serious look. 

"That isn't food she needs to eat properly; gosh you can be really blithering sometimes." 

"Well for starters no one says blithering these days." Emilia pouted as they went back and forth on the topic. 

"We're not done with this topic but I'll go check on Keid alright?" Subaru gave her the thumbs up and she walked off towards Keids room. Honestly Subaru can be so stupid sometimes but that's what she loves about him. He was the only person who ever looked at Emilia and thought her being a half elf was cute. Not in a million years would she have ever thought someone would love her, someone would cherish her, someone that gave her a family, and someone who taught her how to love someone with all their heart. More than anything she loved Natsuki Subaru so much she can't think of a life without him. He changed her life so much, only one person could change this much and she was thankful the man she loved also loved her in return. 

Once Emilia reached the doors of Keid and Chochorina's room she opened the doors to see Keid and Beatrice reading a book. 

"Looks like your mother is here, I suppose." Beatrice closed the book as soon as Emilia arrived thinking she'll borrow Keid. 

"Mom, can I stay with Beako a little bit more? I want to see how the story ends." Keid may have been a shy kid but when it came to something like reading books, he didn't want anyone ruining his experiences. 

"Don't worry I'm not stopping you from reading the rest of the book. I just wanted to see how you were doing." Emilia knew better than anyone that a kid should be allowed to do whatever they want at times and this was something she didn't want to ruin. 

"Beatrice, I haven't seen you a lot lately. I remember when you wouldn't leave Subaru and now you won't leave the kids." 

It's true, the day Chochorina was born Beatrice wanted to changed certain specifics to her contract with Subaru and Subaru agreed. The day he should pass on from this world his lineage would take care of Beatrice for the rest of her life. Beatrice grew very attached to Chochorina and Keid, especially Keid. Keid and Beatrice relationship was one of Aunt and nephew. While she did care extremely about Chochorina, Beatrice found herself more attached to the timid boy. 

"Well, it's Betty's job to watch over Subaru's kids while their parents are busy flirting, in fact," Beatrice stated. 

"You don't have to, me and Subaru would gladly spend the entire day with them if you let us." Subaru and Emilia saw their kids pretty often but there were days when both were too busy with the country or were needed somewhere else. 

"That won't be needed, I suppose. You may be their parents but Subaru would like them to know many people and have many connections so their futures would be filled with many memories, in fact." Subaru said something similar about that to Emilia at one point. When they first made a contract Subaru would have gladly spent all his time with Beatrice but he wanted those 400 years' worth of memories to be filled with other people around her. Beatrice is doing exactly that; she may have trouble going out and talking to others but these children and their families after them will fill those 400 years of memories. But none of them will ever top what Subaru gave her and she owes him the safety of his family. 

Emilia couldn't help but smile at what she heard. Subaru made such an influence on Beatrice and such that influence went straight back to her. She heard those words before but they never stuck with her and now she wants that lesson engraved into her children. That'll be the only thing she ever asked out of them to ensure their futures are safe. 

"Can I go back and read I wanna see how the story ends." Keid broke the silence that entered the room, he never liked it when the room got too quiet. 

"Ok ok, I'll leave you to your books okay Keid?" When Keid heard the words come out of her mother's mouth he couldn't help but smile. Keid never wanted to disobey his parents which was sweet and worrying for him. On one hand both Subaru and Emilia loved that he didn't argue unlike Chochorina but Subaru sometimes wished he would make his own choices for himself outside of what he enjoys. He was only 9 of course but that worried Subaru since this kind of world isn't nice and there were days that worried him. That didn't worry Emilia since with time they'll learn, all kids do. 

"Bye Mom Love You," waved Keid 

"Love you too sweetie!" Emilia couldn't help but bring out her biggest smiles when it came to her children. She would do anything to make sure they stay happy and receive a life much better than hers.


	2. A Loving Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chochorina is the best and Keid needs hugs.

As Chochorina’s hair danced in the wind, Patrasche was sprinting through the forest. Both girls loved the feeling of wind, especially Chochorina. Her father always told her to be careful when riding through the forest. He never stopped mentioning to run away from dogs and rabbits. She never asked but her mother always seemed to agree. 

Chochorina sometimes felt like her parents worry for her too much. There were few times when her father ever lectured her but when it came to her mother of course; Emilia always told her to watch out for others and not to hide the fact she’s a quarter-elf. She never knew why her mother warned her of people, yeah people are dangerous, but she can handle herself so what’s the issue. Besides Emilia’s lectures she’s always supportive of what she decides to do. 

“Where do you feel like heading Patrasche?” The two would always travel to a nearby village or go see a friend of her dad’s. There were days when Chochorina had no idea where to go so she sometimes asked Patrasche if she ever felt going anywhere specific. The ground dragon roared and nodded to a certain direction and Chochorina knew immediately where she wanted to go. 

The silvered hair girl nodded and held on tighter as the ground dragon began to accelerate. 

“Say Subaru, do you know when Chochorina might come back to eat?” Emilia asked as both Subaru and she were walking down the hall. 

As Subaru turned around to answer he realized Emilia won’t like his answer. “Well not really. She just asked if she could play with Patrasche but like I said, she ate already.” 

“Mayonnaise Isn’t Food!” Emilia was reaching her limit. 

“Look Emilia-tan, she’ll come back to eat. Rina is just having fun and before she knows it, she’ll be hungry and come back.” 

“I hope your right. I’m just worried someone might hurt her since she’s, well you know...” 

Even after all these years people still discriminated demi-humans, especially half and quarter-elves. “She’ll be alright, you know everyone who lives around here supports you. This isn’t like when you were just a royal candidate, you’re the queen now.” 

14 years ago, the royal selection was held. There were only 4 out of the 5 candidates. Emilia, Felt, Crusch, and Anastasia. Priscilla dropped out since she was needed in Vollachia and became the Empress of the Vollachian Empire. This did help Emilia’s odds but that didn’t mean her biggest competition dropped out. Her biggest hurdle was undoubtedly Crusch. 

Since she gained her memories back, she was able to quickly pick up the support she lost when her memories were taken away. It also didn’t help that Anastasia was still gaining support over the years. While it was true Emilia’s reputation was better than before it didn’t mean her chances of winning increased. No one believed that she had what it took to be Queen. 

During the events of Priestella and Pleiades tower Emilia gained attention. After those events Emilia had to prove herself in her leadership since that was something, she lacked in. Around a year before the royal selection began, the Witch Cult attacked the royal capital. Subaru was needed since he had a history with defeating multiple Archbishops. Before arriving to help the capital, Subaru wanted Emilia to take the lead since, she needed to be in the role of leadership someday. 

During that fight Emilia took charge proving herself to the people in the capital and putting herself in the frontlines. Capella was the center of the issues and was quickly captured by Reinhard after dealing with the massive army of Cultist. Many more events led Emilia to allow the people of Lugnica to accept her as a leader and ultimately led Emilia to be the ruler of the Kingdom. That didn’t mean her discrimination disappeared. 

This discrimination was the only thing Emilia feared that her children would have to come to face. All because they were the descendants of a half-devil. “I know but-” 

“She’ll be fine trust me; she is our child after all.” Subaru smiled at her with no signs of doubt. 

“Is it alright if I kiss you?” Emilia stopped and inched further to Subaru. 

“Is that a rhetorical question.” Subaru smiled and wrapped his arms around Emilia. 

Subaru pulled her waist closer to his body and they embraced. Their lips made contact in an instant. As the two felt each other for the billionth time they both couldn’t help but enjoy every moment they had together. 

As their lips parted Subaru barely had a gasp of air as Emilia returned her lips where she felt at home. Even after all the years together, the two never were ashamed to hide their love for one and another. If anything, their love only made a certain half-elf more assertive when the two got heated. Like the time whe- 

“Can the two of you not go a day without making out, I suppose.” 

The two couple turn around to see Beatrice holding Keid’s hand while Keid’s face was uncomfortable at the sight of his parents kissing. 

“Sorry that you had to see that Keid. I know how weird it feels to see your parents kissing.” Subaru kneeled and pet Keid’s head. Honestly a 9-year-old would feel pretty disturbed if you saw your parents kiss with someone else watching. 

“It’s ok but can you not do that again please.” 

“I promise.” That was a lie. Everyone knew Subaru was terrible at keeping his promises. Besides if he let Emilia promise Keid he knew she wouldn’t let him kiss her again for the rest of her life. 

“So, what are we eating today I’m starving?” As Keid said that he started to walk in between his parents holding their hands. 

“Well, we don’t know yet since Frederica and Petra haven’t come back and I’m not going to have Ram make food.” 

“What if I make it?” Emilia did get better at making food over the years. If Subaru was being honest with himself it was above average since cooking wasn’t something Emilia dedicated her life too. 

“Well, that would be better, but we still don’t have food remember.” 

As Subaru pointed out Emilia pouted at him. Knowing what she wanted to hear didn’t come out. 

“But yes, it would be amazing if you made it instead of Ram.” 

With those words Emilia’s face brightened up and started humming and Keid joined her. If one thing hasn’t improved of the last 17 years, Emilia was still pretty bad at singing. It also didn’t help that Keid was also tone deaf. While Emilia’s humming was terrible, Subaru couldn’t comprehend what he heard coming from Keid. 

“Dad why are you making that weird face?” There wasn’t a chance in hell Subaru would be able to endure the noises of death that were transpiring currently. If anything, he’d rather see Liliana’s stupid face then hearing whatever this was. 

“I think we might need to get bucket-chan again...” 

“Where are you going, I suppose?” Beatrice couldn’t help but ask her Contractor why he was heading off in the opposite direction. 

But Subaru didn’t respond back as he walked off to go look for something, I suppose. Beatrice urged Emilia and Keid to head towards the main lobby, but Beatrice decided to head towards Subaru. 

“Nope not there. Where the hell is it, did they move them somewhere else. I swore that I saw Ram leave one in here before.” As Beatrice entered the room, she couldn’t help but notice how the entire room was a mess while Subaru was looking for something. 

“What are you doing, in fact.” Subaru turned around to see the drill loli her arms folded as she stared him down. 

“Looking for buckets, didn’t you hear how bad Emilia-tan and Keid were humming? It was awful.” Subaru couldn’t help but try to fix the situation. If he didn’t, he knew he was going to die by his wife and kid one day. 

“Subaru is useless, I suppose. The buckets are held on the other side of the mansion, in fact.” As Subaru heard that he knew where he had to go. 

Subaru picked up Beatrice and he decided to venture off to the other side of the mansion. He let Beatrice walk instead of being carried but he knew she missed being held by her Contractor. It’s been a while since they’ve been like this since she was always busy taking care of the kids while Subaru and Emilia were busy dealing with the kingdom. 

As the two walked off their minds were set on one thing, to find and ask for bucket-chans guidance once more. 

The wind and breeze of the speed that Patrasche was running felt amazing. Chochorina always felt at ease when feeling the air slice through her hair. Patrasche was starting to slow down as soon as their location was in sight, an obstacle course. There were pillars lined up varying in distance and size. Chochorina jumped off the ground dragon to see if she could see him training. 

“Not today missy.” As Chochorina tried to scout out the blonde-haired tiger she only found herself caught. The quarter-elf turned around nervously to see Garfiel looking down on her. 

“I swear I wasn’t going to do anything uncle Gar. I just reaaaaally like seeing you train that’s all.” She wasn’t lying about watching him train, she was always excited to see Garfiel run through the obstacle course, but she always had a habit of adding something new to the course every time she visited. 

“Fine but stay right ‘ere. I don’t want ya to ruin this for me princess.” Garfiel warned the girl as he walked off ready to give another run, but Chochorina was ready to test the golden tiger. 

As Garfiel started to run through the course jumping from one pillar to another, he found shards of ice fly past him. He quickly saw that a giggling Chochorina was shooting ice crystals at him and could only bring a smile on his face. 

Chochorina got her next pair of crystals ready as soon as Garfiel starts to make his way towards her. She shoots the pair at the tiger but misses due to not predicting where Garfiel will be. As Garfiel closes the distance between them, Chochorina builds up plenty of mana and greats a giant like drill aimed directly at Garfiel. 

“My drill is the drill that will pierce the heavens!” As the elf announced her final words for her Giga drill break. Garfiel prepared by partially transforming his right arm into his tiger form in order to smash right through Chochorina’s drill. 

Crystals were sent flying everywhere and a piece even knocked down a pillar. As both Chochorina and Garfiel watch as the pillar falls in its destruction, both of them couldn’t help but laugh off the situation. 

“Ya almost got me that time. Train a bit more and next time you’ll get a hit in.” 

“No fair you used your tiger form I have no chance on hitting you if you cheat,” expressed Chochorina. 

“Excuses won’t getcha anywhere like that, just ask the cap’n, he may be weak but he’s fucking badass.” Chochorina couldn’t help but doubt that statement. She heard how much her father saved the kingdom of Lugnica with her mother. She knew how strong her mother was as she apparently holds the most amount of mana in the entire world and it wasn’t even a competition. Her father on the other hand was apparently the weakest knight in the entire kingdom. To her it didn’t make sense how he was so weak, but he was so amazing and labeled a hero. 

“Fine I’ll ask him, but he would just tell me to never give up.” The princess couldn’t help but remember the same advice Subaru always told her. “But if I ask him how he would do it he’ll just say he can’t tell me how.” 

“The cap’n just has his own way with dealing with things. Just ask him how he beat my amazin’ self. That should give ya an idea.” While true she has heard her father beat Garfiel and she never did ask. 

“O K! Let’s go and ask dad right now, come on Patrasche let’s go home really quick so we can kick uncle Gar’s butt. As the elven princess ran towards the ground dragon, she jumped right on to the saddle and let out a cry to head out. 

Chochorina looked back at Garfiel and waved her hands as she disappeared back into the forest. While on her way back home she couldn’t help but think why her dad was called weak. To her, Subaru was a hero because he was strong not because he was weak. Someone who is weak wouldn’t work so hard to protect people and almost die but because they do so they’re strong. To Chochorina that’s what it takes to become strong, to never give up. So why did many people call her dad the weakest knight? 

According to stories Chochorina heard about her dad, Subaru was the one who knew the most about defeating the Witch Cult that was active a couple of years back. Subaru also was the one who killed sloth, the white whale, and the great rabbit. He also formed the pairs of teams that would head out and kill the Archbishops in Priestella and allowed the group of people in Pleiades tower to survive. Eventually a couple of years ago it was found out that he was also a Sage Canidate. 

The Sage was one of the three hero's that stopped The Witch of Envy from destroying the world. He was the next sage like Reinhard to how he was the current Sword Saint. In this case it was much more of a surprise since no one expected a sage candidate to be a thing, especially it being Subaru. 

There was many thing Subaru did afterwards as the sage such as helping in the battle in the royal capital and allowing Reinhard to capture Capella. It was also found out that Subaru was able to absorb all the Witch Factors and with the death of Capella Subaru was able to revert everyone back to normal that was affected by the authority of Lust. Chochorina also heard he held every Witch Factor, but he doesn’t use most of them for some reason. 

As Chochorina was trying to sort out all the stories she’s heard about her dad she found herself seeing the Mansion up ahead. One thing was for certain. She wasn’t ready for what was transpiring inside the mansion. 

“Louder Keid-sama. You won’t be able to improve if you stay quiet or do you want to be as useless as your waste of life ‘father’.” Out of all things that she was expecting to happen today, this was not it. 

“Keid you have to be like me if you want to be good,” said Emilia with a bucket on her head. “Emilia-sama if anything you don’t have a say in this at all.” 

“Huuuuh you sure? I’m pretty sure I’m good at this now.” While both Emilia and Ram were discussing the topic of Emilia’s terrible singing, Keid was making little to no noises with bucket-chan. 

“Keid if you don’t want to do this anymore then you could just take the bucket off you know.” Subaru was watching over the two’s performances and while Emilia was ‘trying’, Keid hasn’t been exactly the most excited for this activity. “I want to practice but I don’t want to practice here...” 

“Then come with me, I suppose. If you don’t want to practice with others around, you than Betty will watch over your progress.” Beatrice walked over to the young boy and offered her hand. 

“I-I'm good, I just don’t want to practice right now is all.” It was obvious to everyone in the room the Keid wasn’t the most confident when it came to his appearance and talents. Subaru sometimes wondered if his confidence was passed down from him when he wasn’t confident in his ability to save others. “Keid...” 

“You okay Keid? Subaru caught Keid in silence and its worried Subaru. He had to be honest with him. If anyone would be able to tell what was wrong with Keid, it would be him. “I don’t know if you would understand.” Keid couldn’t lie to him when he asks something like that up front. His mother always told him that it wasn’t good to lie and he took it to heart. “There’s a good chance that I would be able to understand, you just have to let others know that you need something.” 

“Can I tell you later, right now I’m hungry.” Subaru just chucked it up as he found out his son's priorities. “Yeah, we’ll go get something to eat. Go and tell Rem to get the food ready while I get your mother and sister really quick. Oh, also take Beako with you.” With that Keid and Beatrice ran off to the kitchen leaving Subaru to deal with Emilia and Ram. 

“Compared to 17 years ago I’m really good now I’ll let you know.” 

“True, back then I still held respect for you until you decided to marry an ugly man with no worth.” 

“You reaaally can’t be honest with your feelings Ram. I remember you shedding a tear at our wedding, it was reaaaaally nice of you.” Ram couldn’t help but be offended by that statement. 

“Emilia-sama you should watch you speak of because I remember no such thing ever happening. To even think I helped you raise these poor infants that have the same blood as Barusu.” 

“Hey! I’m right here you know!” Subaru couldn’t help but jump in the conversation since his name was being bashed. “Barusu if you think you have something worth saying say it then.” Ram folded her arms as she waited for an answer to come out. 

“Well, uuuuhhhh...shit.” He didn’t exactly have a proper response since anything he say would sound stupid. “Thought so.” 

“If dad is reaaaaaaally so bad then how come he’s a hero?” Chochorina couldn’t help but also join in on the conversation. 

“That’s because you father is a useless man that only has one good thing about him and that’s his stupid timing. Wherever he goes he manages to fix the situation without issues.” That would be the closest thing to a complement that Ram will ever say about Subaru. “Well doesn’t that make him useful then. I think you can’t be honest and just tell us that you reaaaally care about dad. If you reaaaaally didn’t care, then why did you help me make his birthday present that one time?” 

“Awww why you look at that. I knew you loved me.” Subaru came close to Ram with open arms before she shut him down. “Touch me and I’ll make sure that you’ll never be able to create another child ever again.” Ram glared back daggers as Subaru backed off as he liked where his dick was as it is. 

“Maybe we should go eat and show all our love to the food instead.” Emilia clapped her hands as she announced what they should all do. “Emilia-tan has the right idea. Let’s Go!” 

After a well-cooked meal from Rem, Chochorina and Keid ran outside and decided to play with couple of the spirits Emilia calls. Both Subaru and Emilia were sitting down while watching from the side as they saw their children play with each other. 

“I’m glad Rina and Keid get along perfectly fine with each other.” Subaru couldn’t help but be grateful that his kids didn’t fight each other. “They’re siblings, of course they would get along.” 

“Emilia-tan not all siblings get along, there is some that just don’t like each other for no reason.” Both Emilia and Subaru didn’t have many experiences with siblings. Emilia never had much time we her family before she got frozen for 100 years and the only thing close to a family was Puck and that was it. Subaru got along with his parents but his admiration for his father held him back. So, when the day came that the two wanted to build a family, both were nothing more than happy that they could even have something like this. “I know it's just that, I’m glad that we’re allowed to be this happy,” Emilia said this as she rested her head on Subaru’s shoulders. “Yeah, me too.” 

Emilia wanted to do her best for her children and make sure they experience nothing but happiness, so they don’t have to go through what she did. Subaru wanted nothing more than for his family to get along with each other like with his parents. One thing that always worried him was either of his kids developing similar issues that he went through with his own parents. In a way it is happening with Keid. 

Thankfully Subaru was able to pick up on this early on. He wants to make sure, step by step, that Keid is confident in his own strengths and doesn’t compare himself to his parents. Emilia herself knows that Keid has these issues but she has this feeling that she shouldn’t exactly interfere just yet. She always seen how much time and care Subaru puts into helping out Keid whenever and however he can. 

As the two watched the kids play, a certain drill loli decided to appear. “You two seem to be enjoying yourselves, in fact.” 

“We sure are Beako. Wanna join us?” Subaru pat his thighs inviting the Great Spirit. 

“If Subaru wish's for Betty to comfort him clearly his wife isn’t taking much care of her Contractor, I suppose.” Beatrice declared as she made her way right into Subaru’s laps. “Huuuuh? I’m positive that I’m taking care of Subaru just fine. I hug him every day and tell him I love him.” Emilia was sure that Subaru was perfectly fine with her. Every moment they get with each other, Emilia makes sure that any stress Subaru has she plans on taking it away, whatever method it takes. 

“An airhead like you couldn’t understand Subaru’s needs. Maybe if you were as cute as Betty than maybe this wouldn’t be an issue, in fact.” As the two girls argued Subaru just smiled as nothing could be better than this. 

“INCOMING!” 

As Subaru was watching the two girls fight, he didn’t notice that a certain silvered hair princess was falling from the sky right towards them. 

As Chochorina dropped right into Subaru and Beatrice, Emilia managed to avoid getting tackled along. Chochorina couldn’t help but laugh it off while Subaru was on the verge of dying and Beatrice getting sandwiched. 

“Ummmm Chochorina mind telling us what just happened?” Emilia tilted her head as she asked the question on everyone’s mind. “Well, you see Keid and I were playing, and I made a reaaaaally big drill but instead of pushing it I got pushed back.” 

“But that doesn’t explain how you got into the air, in fact!” 

“That was my fault Beako.” Keid came run towards the crash landed Chochorina to explain what happened. “I was helping Chocho make the drill spin really fast, but it sent her flying into the air when we tried releasing it...” Keid seemed really disappointed that their plan didn’t work out instead of being sorry that his dad got crushed. 

“Now we know not to make big drills and spin it really fast since people get hurt.” While Emilia was lecturing the kids for their stunt, no one was paying attention to the buried Natsuki Subaru. After a while Emilia noticed that Subaru seemed to be out cold since he hadn’t moved a muscle. Heck, even his breathing wasn’t proper. Emilia didn’t seem to be worried as she went over and picked up her dying husband. 

“Will Dad be ok?” 

“We’re reaaaaaally sorry.” 

The two children walked along with their mother as she took Subaru to bed. “He’ll be perfectly fine. He’s had worse, but since he’s an old man now we have to go a little easier on him.” Emilia giggled at the fact that Subaru was getting old, but she was getting older. 

As Emilia walked over to their room and placed the knocked-out Subaru to bed, Chochorina couldn’t help but be disappointed. “Dad was supposed to continue the story he was telling us today,” grumbled Chochorina. “That’s right! He was busy telling us the story about how Jotaro beat Dio!” Keid also remembered that his dad stopped right as their fight was about to begin. 

“It’s ok, you guys can hear it some other-” 

“NO!” Emilia was caught off as the two couldn’t agree with Emilia. 

“The story took too long to get here. We’re at the end and some parts of the story wasn’t even necessary. There was a giant boat they had to fight for no reason!” Keid was busy complaining that Subaru dragged the story in some parts. Emilia couldn’t really defend Subaru as she was never told this story before. 

“I’m sorry Keid but you have to wait. I want to make sure your dad gets lots of sleep since he’s always busy helping others.” As Emilia tried her best to persuade the kids nothing was working, they were going to listen to how the story ends one way or another. 

“Betty will tell you how the story ends, I suppose.” 

“Wait you know how it ends?” Chochorina was surprised to hear the Beatrice knew about the story in the first place. “Of course, Betty knew of it. Who do you think Subaru told all these stories to in the first place?” 

As Beatrice told the kids that she would finish the story Keid and Chochorina couldn’t wait any longer and dragged Beatrice out of the room. Emilia sat on the bed watching as her fingers played with Subaru’s hair. 

“We have such a loving family, don’t we Subaru.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So originally I had a good chunk of text about Keid's inner thoughts about his issues, but I decide to take it away since this story is all fluff. Maybe. But I reduced the amount of time on it since I felt like this should more of a fun read instead of something getting invested into.
> 
> Also I first wrote this like at 3 in the morning so I found myself going back and fixing the grammar but I did this at like 10 in the afternoon so I'm also tired currently. So expect some mistakes to make it though since I'm blind as all fuck.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter since this is still me going into Keid and Chochorina personalities.


	3. Why I Love You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Recap from the past 17 years.

_ Pain in the ass woman! _

17 years ago, I met Subaru at the Loot House in the Royal Captial. When I first met him, he had the weirdest appearance I’ve ever seen. To his clothes, hair, and the way he talked at times was weird. But the weirdest thing of all, was the fact that meeting him, my life changed.

I was  soooo used to no one besides Puck caring for me, that when Subaru came along, he gave me  soooo much attention and acted so friendly with me. At first, I just wanted him to give him the payment he deserved for saving me back at the Loot House, that I  didn’t take notice that I was  sooooo happy when  I’m with him. When I caught him having lots of stress, I wanted to do something. I brought him hear  didn’t I. 

That’s what I told myself back then. It was  actually because I wanted to help him, and to keep him with me longer. Subaru got hurt later and when he came back with all his injuries, how could I not blame myself? But he still treated me with kindness and even asked me out on a date. I didn’t understand why he did all of this, but all I knew was I was happy whenever I was with him. 

Those first few months with him were fun. Whenever we had time, we talked or played a game that Subaru always  came up with . I liked being with him but not everything was great back then. We had our first fight. 

I had hopes that he could  see me as a regular girl, but even to him I was special and couldn’t look at me the same. I thought, this is what happens if he stands with me. This is what happens if I let someone get close to me. They get hurt because of me. But he came back to me. He always did. I was  soooo confused, why did he come back. I never did understand why he pushed himself when he said it was for me. Now I know why. 

It was because he loved me. 

I didn’t know how to respond to his feelings that day. All I knew was whatever my heart was feeling, I wanted to keep that feeling. 

Lots of things happened during the following weeks.  Roswaal had his own plans, the mansion was under attack, the Great Rabbit was coming. A lot of it was dangerous and we lived somehow, all thanks to Subaru. Lots of good things happened too.  Garfiel joined us, I passed the trials, Beatrice was in a contract with Subaru, and we sent the Great Rabbit somewhere else entirely. But to me, nothing was the conversation me and Subaru had. 

My memories were blocked off it was  soooo strange. The trials felt impossible to beat and forgetting mother Fortuna and father Guese was unforgivable. I should have never forgotten them. I felt so terrible. When Subaru broke his promise to me again, I couldn’t trust him. I had to run away from this. But Subaru always finds me.

I was giving everyone a hard time because I couldn’t get myself together, but when Subaru came and talked to me, I couldn’t help but not trust him. He lied like everyone else did. He knew that promises were important, but he went and lied to me again. What was so hard about holding my hand for the night. Worse, he just looked at me and told me nothing. He said he loved me, but he never showed it. He would treat me like a doll and not a normal person. That’s what I thought, until he called me a pain in the ass woman. 

That’s what he called me. 

From there I had my first kiss. Back then, I  didn’t know what to do. It was a new feeling and it all happened  soooo fast. But when our lips touched, when our tongues met, I could feel time stopping. That day, I wanted to return the feelings Subaru gave me. I wanted to give him a proper answer. I wanted to understand how to love him. 

Took me a long time to even understand sadly. A year later we continued our lives and he waited. He never brought the topic up, but I knew why. No matter what he said, he had to wait until I even gave him a proper answer. What sucks more is that it took our safety to even recognize my feelings for him. Regulus tried to make me his wife, but I couldn’t as I wanted to marry Subaru instead. I think that’s when I started to realize my feelings towards him. When the topic of marriage came up, I would talk about it, and I always thought of Subaru in the back of my head. Why? Why would I talk about this if he isn’t even here? I knew why. If I ever wanted to be married, it would be with Subaru and no one else. 

Somewhere around when we went to Pleiades Tower, that’s when I started to understand love. Every time he was missing or injured, I didn’t want to let him go. I didn’t want anyone else near him because I felt like he might get hurt again. When I found him with Shaula, I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to hug him to show him how much he worried me, but I didn’t. Instead, I kicked him. I didn’t know why I did it, but seeing him with someone else, it made me jealous.

We talked and I didn’t want to leave him out of my sights, but when it mattered the most, he lost his memories. 

I didn’t know what to do. He didn’t remember me; he didn’t remember Beatrice; he didn’t remember nothing he did when he was with us. I was worried that Subaru might be afraid of me, I thought he would never love me again or even be kind to me. But Subaru was still Subaru. Even without his memories he still complemented me and even said I was dangerously cute. All my fears vanished but I still wanted to get his memories back. He was such a dunderhead for even losing them. 

When he got his memories back, I didn’t care if I was fighting an Archbishop, all I wanted was to be with Subaru. Looking back, we were  reaaaaaaaally awkward back then. We couldn’t stop touching each other and we kept flirting. I didn’t  reaaally know how to flirt back then but I just knew we were flirting. During that moment, I just wanted nothing but be with Subaru.

He always told me about the stars. He told me all of their names and stories each one had. He always looked mesmerized when he looked up and talked about them. I always smiled whenever he had passion in his voice. I always wanted to see him like that because it made him  soooo happy. Now whenever I look at him, he was my star. 

After a couple months since we came back from the tower, my heart felt  reaaaaaaally weird whenever I saw him. It was like I couldn’t even talk to him anymore. I felt  reaaaaally bad that I ignored him for some time. I didn’t know what to say and whenever I  tried, I got too flustered to even think. 

When the time came for me to confess my feelings to him, I wanted to show him how much  I’ve gone through. I wanted to show him I understood his feelings for me. I wanted to show him how much I loved him. When I finally confessed my feelings, it felt like a huge weight on my heart finally lifted. 

I love Natsuki Subaru. The way he treats me, the way he does his best to help others, how he never hides how he feels, to his sharp looking eyes I love so dear. Whenever I look at him, my heart can’t stop  throbbing . He was able to help me live a life I can be proud of. He made me a stronger person. He gave me the confidence I needed. He allowed me to become the Queen. He allowed me to save the people at Elior Forest. He showed me what it was like to understand love, and to love the person I hold so dear to me. 

I love him so, so  so much. Everything about him is perfect in my eyes. When it came time to maybe start a family, we had to get married first. At the time it wasn’t possible. I wasn’t allowed to get married until the Royal Selection was over and it felt too early for the both of us. We had to wait for quite some time. Thankfully no one wanted to marry a half-elf so me and Subaru never had to worry about someone trying to marry me. When I was finally announced as Queen, I was sent many offerings to marry some nobles. I declined all of them obviously. The day I was made Queen, Subaru made the dumbest choice imaginable. 

He proposed to me that very same day. Not only the same day, but during my own Ceremony.  It’s like if I was confessing my feelings to Subaru when he was being knighted. But it was Subaru, he  didn’t care if it was in front of the whole country. He always showed the world how much he loves me; this was no different. I  couldn’t turn him down, especially with  sooooo many people there. That day was a memory that both of us will never forget.

2 years into our marriage I asked Subaru about having kids. We always talked about having kids and what we could name them. He wanted to name them after the stars. A lot of star names sounded funny and only a few  sounded good. But every name I came up with, Subaru just laughed. He kept saying things like, ‘who would name their child  Tonnura .’ Subaru was such a knucklehead that he didn’t take my naming skills seriously. The only one he liked was  Chochorina . The more he said it the more he liked it apparently. At least he liked one of them.

When we were deciding if we were ready or not, Subaru asked me something  reaaaally important. He asked if I knew what sex was. I didn’t know how, but with all my years with Subaru, he never told me how babies were properly made. He always told me to ask Ram, Rem, or Frederica. He was my husband why didn’t he tell me. Now I know why. I don’t want to think back to that conversation as it was too embarrassing to remember. Subaru had to get help from Ram as since Rem and Frederica were busy at the time. Let's just say that Ram wasn’t pulling any punches for Subaru, or even me at that matter.

After having a ‘interesting’ conversation, Ram left the room and gave me some weird advice. She told me if Subaru didn’t have the confidence to do it, I’ll have to take control. That’s what she said, if it came from me. She was much, much harsher and used  reaaaaally weird words. But later that day me and Subaru had a,  interesting time. 

Lots of things happened afterwards,  Chochorina was born, we moved away from the Castle and back to  Roswaals mansion. We thought it would be better if  Chochorina would grow up with people and not just maids that are there to do their jobs. Her growing up around people like  Garfiel and Otto was something Subaru wanted. But he always made she didn’t pick up any funny habits from  Garfiel since he always bit through metal knives. 

Everything I have right now is all thanks to Subaru. He gave me everything. He showed me what it was like to love someone. He showed me what it was like to have a family. He gave me  everything, so I want to give him everything as well. 

That’s why I love him.

* * *

_ Promise-breaking liar! _

I can’t believe it's been 17 years since I met Emilia. I don’t know what I would have done the moment I entered  Lugnica . It felt so fast, and it was so rough on me for being weak. But the moment Emilia came and helped me out she gave me something to follow at first.  _ I  _ _ gotta _ _ help her. _ That’s what I thought. She helped me and I wanted to help her, simple as that. Who knew that later down the line the same thing repeated over and over  again. Of course, my life here can’t be all nice and I  have to find out I can Return  By Death. Nice and Subaru don’t have a good pairing after all. But Subaru and Emilia have a 1000% compatibility rate!

At first, I felt like I owed her for saving me, yeah, I wanted to genuinely help her out, but she saved me big time. She’ll never know how much she really helped me out in that first loop. Without her, I don’t think I would have been able to improve as a person. Because of her I was able to move past my fla- wait. Shit. No, too early, that happens later. But thanks to her, she gave me a place to stay, a new start, and a reason to keep going. 

After the whole debacle with Elsa, I found myself at  Roswaal’s mansion. There I met Ram and Rem and started my life as a butler. After finding out Rem killed me because I had the Witch’s scent all over me, what was I supposed to do? I couldn’t tell Emilia about Return  By Death, I couldn’t convince Rem I wasn’t a Witch Cultist, I didn’t know what to do. But I vowed that I would save Rem from dying in my place. I would make sure I prevented anyone from dying. But nothing was ever easy. I tried so god damn hard to make sure I didn’t seem too suspicious to Rem. I tried so hard to make everything right. I felt like I was going to die. I didn’t want to die, not again. I had to keep going no matter what. If I failed here, what  does it mean to try again. If I try again, doesn’t that mean I would fail no matter what. But Emilia noticed however, why wouldn’t she. 

Of all things Emilia would do is give me a lap pillow, this girl was so adorable. When it came time to talk about what was going on, I didn’t want to talk about it. I couldn’t talk about it. I didn’t want to drag Emilia into this. But she had to smooth talk her way into my heart. Every little thing she did that day captured my heart. Her soothing voice, her tender skin, her beautiful silver hair, all of it was telling me to calm down and let it out. So, I did. 

I cried and cried until nothing came out. I sank my head into her laps as I sought for comfort. I told her everything I could to let out my stress. I let it all out, and she sat there, comforting me. That’s when I knew I loved Emilia. Ever since coming to this world, she saved me no matter what it was. No matter how little or how big, she would always save me. I cried so much I fell asleep on her laps. Good going Subaru, great steps towards your relationship. Take notes, if you ever want your crush to love you, cry on her laps and fall asleep like a child. Worked for me.

After she saved me from the brink of insanity, I had to take what Emilia gave me and make it all worth it in this loop. No matter what it took. I did my best to save everyone in the village and in the mansion. I couldn’t help but be a sore loser and get cursed a thousand times making the situation worse. We figured it out thankfully. After that we had peace in the mansion for a few months. 

I went out on my date with Emilia, made mayonnaise, played the king game, we did lots of things. I enjoyed every minute of it. Too bad I had to go and fuck it all up. I messed up big time at the Royal Selection. I made terrible impressions, embarrassed myself, and worse of all, I  embarrassed Emilia. 

I acted like I could do anything, especially with everything that I’ve done up till then. I was an incompetent idiot who tried to look good in front of a girl. The worst part is, I have to die over and over and over again to even tell myself I haven’t changed. All my life, I did nothing. Nothing changed ever since coming here. Thankfully Rem was the one who told me I was worth something. Did I have feelings for her, yes. Was I the worst for having feelings for two girls, absolutely. I didn’t think about that during that time, I had more important matters.

After I got rid of Betelgeuse, I had to confront Emilia. I had so many things to say to her, so many, but I only said 3 words to tell her when I first saw her.  _ I Love You. _

Those words were all I needed. I didn’t get the chance to say them before, but if she was going to push me away, that’s all I needed to say. After getting the bomb away from the carriages, me and Emilia sat down and talked. I made sure to apologize to her, I made sure to tell her how I feel. I made sure. After everything, I fought to see her smile. 

But life doesn’t like to treat me well now does it. I find out  Roswaal knows about Return  By Death and plans on using me and sent assassins to the mansion and the Great Rabbits were coming. Didn’t help that I was so busy with the Witches that I didn’t ask for anyone else's help. I thought if only I died and suffered, then no one else would have too as well. It took the Witch of Envy herself to love myself more. Well technically wasn’t the Witch, it was  Satella . If she was telling me to love myself more, I had to try at least. 

I made a bet with  Roswaal and I had to confront Emilia afterwards. If she was going to trust me, I had to ask her what was bothering her. It was the least I could do. She told me what was going on in the trials. She told me how she was stuck in the ice for 100 years. She told me everything that was bothering her. I wanted to help her in the trials and make sure she stood tall, no matter how much she fell. But when I promised her that I’d hold her hand until the next day, I broke my promise again. I still don’t know if it was worth going into the trials and writing on the walls or I wasn’t thinking about her feelings. I still don’t know. But we argued like hell inside the tomb.

I tried to get her to believe me, I tried everything I could, but she just wouldn’t. I didn’t want to show that I was getting angry but I was. It pissed me off that she couldn’t listen to what I was trying to say. I didn’t know what to do and I kissed her. I loved her and I wanted her to know. It wasn’t just a word that I was saying but they were my feelings. The reason why I keep going in this world. 

If anything, that’s probably when our relationship started to actually move a bit. But Emilia wasn’t the best when it came to understanding love so it took much longer than I hoped. Almost 2 years for her to tell me she felt something but that’s later. A year later, our relationship didn’t move as much as I wanted it too. I didn’t really notice this but when we talked, we only focused on each other.  Beako told us that whenever we talk, we ignore everything around us. We never noticed this until years later. Heck, we never even knew we did this early on. It was nice, spending time with her. Until that asshole Regulus showed up and kidnapped her. 

I know, it's been years since that happened, BUT NO ONE NTR’S ME! NO ONE! Even if she wasn’t my wife back then she was mine. I don’t care who you were, no one takes Emilia from me. Thankfully I had Reinhard with me to fuck that bastard up. God she was so gorgeous in that dress. God thinking about it pisses me off that was the first time seeing EMT in a wedding dress! I can’t have anything happy can I. 

Sadly, we couldn’t bring back the people who were turned by  Capella. We sent out to Pleiades Tower, my hell. Emilia starts off the journey by saying something like that even if Rem wakes and  and I focus on her, she’ll do her best to make me look at her back. I was so confused back then, that I didn’t know how to process what she said. I kept it in the back of my head but I couldn't properly make out what she meant. We had nice chats but I had to lose my memories. Like Emilia would say, I’m a dunderhead for losing my memories. 

I never wanted to worry anyone but it was my fault that an Archbishop took over my body. I couldn’t tell her in words how much I loved seeing the sight of Emilia once I regained them. I could stand at her sight, but we both had something to do. After everything that went down in the tower, I wanted to settle down with her. But she started acting really weird. She ignored me at times and seemed to be avoiding me. I didn’t know what was wrong so instead of trying to talk to her, I asked  Beako . She said I was being too oblivious to what was going on. Was it that obvious why she was avoiding me? I didn’t break any promises recently. So, I had no idea.

When I say I was surprised when Emilia told me she loved me, I was frozen. I didn’t know how to feel. It felt like the world finally decided to give me a break and let me feel alive again. I loved Emilia. I loved her so much I would die just from looking at her. My heart would skip a beat the more I stared into her. Every time I would touch her felt like heaven. I don’t deserve her. Of all people she came to love, it was me. There were a billion-better options, but I’m glad she chose me out of everyone. When she told me her feelings, I did my best to cherish her for every moment I had with her like it would be my last. No matter what that second was with her, I would cherish it. 

She’s the very reason why I live, why I never give up, why I dream. She’s everything to me. I don’t care that I suffered to be with her, because she makes it up by a long shot.

We had a lot of fun together. If anything, Emilia was always planning dates and visiting my room every day. There were days when she would even sleep with me or I would sleep with her. Of course, everyone in the mansion knew we were together but we couldn’t exactly just sleep together since we had our own privacy. But we didn’t care after a while. It became common for us to sleep together.  Beako complained but she loved that she could hold onto Emilia in her sleep. When the Royal Selection was coming up, I planned on proposing to her after but I couldn’t wait any longer. I planned to propose to her on her own Ceremony once she was announced as Queen. I had to get certain people to back me up since I wasn’t allowed to interfere with the Ceremony. No one was until Emilia was crowned. So, I asked help from Julius to get permission to make my own moves.

That bastard knew what I was planning and he helped me through every step of the way. Thankfully I got permission to propose to her. The council asked me if I was even sure she would say yes. I knew she would. All the conversations about us having kids and getting married, I knew she would say yes. I wanted to show the world that Emilia would be mine. Let me tell you, I had no idea how much the idea of proposing to Emilia in front of the whole country, didn’t exactly cross my mind. I was in front of everyone when I proposed to her and the first thing she said was yes. Even before I got down to say what I was about to say. The moment she saw me kneel in front of her she yelled out yes. 

That girl didn’t even let me say what I wanted to say. Instead, she took the words right how of me. I still told the world how I felt about her, how much she means to me, I did it all. From that day on, I could finally say I wasn’t the only Natsuki out there in this world. 

We eventually had  Chochorina and Keid. Those two were everything to us. I wanted to make sure their lives would be happy ones compared to me and Emilia. We didn’t want any despair in their lives. They would have issues along the way, but we were here to guide them to a bright future. 

I should also mention that along all these years that I did loose feelings for Rem. It’ll only be natural. 16 years go by and you still have feelings for someone you’re not even with, I’m not the same Subaru as before. Rem still matters to me a lot. She saved me from the darkness and set me on a path that I could never repay. I never did save her. I failed her. So, in return, I promised that I would watch over her right now even if she doesn’t have any memories. 

I’m grateful for everything Emilia has given me. Everything she did for me the past 17 years. She gave me every opportunity in the world. She showed me what it was like to be happy. She showed me how to be myself. I love her for everything she represents in my life. Without her, I would be nothing.

That’s why I love her.

“Hey Otto, were you even listening?” Subaru looked up as he stared as a sleeping Otto.

“ Ehh !? Sorry  Nastuki -san, Emilia- sama came to me earlier this morning and told me the exact same time you just told me...” Otto yawned as he didn’t notice a stunned and angry Subaru.

“Come on man! I literally explained something very important to me.”

“Try listening it to the same thing twice but longer.”

“And you wonder why me, Garf, and Rina bully you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First I want to say sorry for everyone that had to wait like 2 weeks to see the 3rd chapter. If you didn't know on FF I posted the story there first and I haven't updated it in like a while. So I apologize if some of you thought I dropped it. I just had issues trying to write this chapter and I had an entirely different chapter planned but I decided to move it to the next one and get straight to the point. Also last thing is that Otto did not hear anything involving Return By Death. He heard everything but parts mention it so that's what he heard. I hope you guys enjoyed this!


	4. Possibilites

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The entire family is finally together.

“Chochorina. Keid. Please don’t run ahead. Subaru isn’t as young anymore.” Emilia yelled out concerns to her kids as she was walking with Beatrice and Subaru. 

“Betty’s Contractor isn’t a spring chicken anymore, I suppose.” 

“I’M NOT THAT OLD!” 

The Natsuki family had decided to walk through a forest. Chochorina and Keid couldn’t keep their excitement contained, so they decided to run ahead. Subaru, Emilia, and Beatrice took their time in the forest, but Subaru was falling beind. 

“Come on Dad! Stop being old!” Chochorina yelled from afar. 

“Chocho, Dad is trying his best. But come on Dad! I want to get to the river already!” As much as Keid wanted to respect his dad, he agreed with his older sister. 

“No respect for fathers these days,” Subaru grumbled. 

“They’re just excited, Subaru,” Emilia said gently. “But can you please hurry it up a bit, we’ve been to the river many times but I reaaaally want to see it with the kids.” 

Subaru and Emilia have been to the river many times. It was their favorite place to go during dates. Emilia was the one who had found the place when her and Meili would go to the forest and place with some mabeasts. 

“Rina crash-landed on me literally yesterday. Give me a break.” Subaru rubbed his back as he made his excuse. 

“This is true, I suppose.” Beatrice nodded. 

Emilia tilted her head and said, “But you refused to get healed, remember??” 

“This is also true. If Subaru wasn’t such a prideful man, surely we would have been at the river by now, in fact.” 

“Right, Beatrice? It’s so strange that he still has pride in the first place.” Both Beatrice and Emilia walked ahead of Subaru leaving him to consider what has just been spoken. 

“Wait. When did both Emilia-tan and Beako start being so close? I’ve never seen the two trash-talk me this much.” 

Subaru stood there reconsidering his life as he realized that everyone else had already reached the river. He started to run ahead but needed to pause multiple times. 

“Fuck, I may be getting old.” He stopped to rest against a tree, but soon heard a heart-wrenching sound: Chocorina’s scream. 

Subaru ran as fast as he could to catch up with everyone else. What had happened to Chochorina and Keid? It was definitely Chochorina’s scream he just heard. Emilia and Beatrice shouldn’t be too far. Could it be mabeasts? No, Emilia had made sure to put a barrier around here since they had initially planned to come here last week. She even had Meili check if any mabeasts were near the area, and there were none. No more questions, he was about to get to the scream he just heard. 

“No, please no more, if you do, I’ll die!” Subaru could hear Emilia as well, but she was... laughing? What was happening? Once Subaru could finally see what was going on, he saw a bunch of mabeasts licking Emilia. 

Before Subaru could question how beasts got inside, right to Emilia and the mabeasts, Subaru saw a laughing, blue-haired girl with emerald eyes. 

“Meili.” 

Meili turned to Subaru and came running towards him for a hug. 

“It’s been a while, daaad.” 

“It’s been like what, five months since I last saw you?” As much as Subaru was enjoying his time with his adopted daughter, he was angry. 

“Aaaaaaow! What was that for!” Meili started to touch her head when Subaru out of nowhere smacked her. 

“We don’t see you for months and when we call you to check if the river is safe for us, you don’t come and visit!” Chochorina and Keid stood there, afraid to catch their father’s attention. 

“You’re seeing me noooow, aren’t you?” 

“Don’t you dare puppy-eye me right now, young lady. Also, why is there a horde of mabeasts here?” 

Despite Meili’s failed attempt to please her father, Subaru couldn’t help but be distracted by the amounts of mabeasts he saw around them. He knew they were safe since Meili was there but didn’t know what they were doing here. 

“Since I knew you guys were coming here, I decided to bring some animals for Chocho and Keid to plaaay with.” 

“That makes more sense.” Subaru stood and watched as he saw Chochorina and Keid riding a Wolgarm. 

“Of all the mabeasts could choose, you chose the one that you sent to attack me and Rem in the forest.” Meili could hear the sound of distaste in Subaru’s voice. 

“Hmmmm. Nothing like a blaaaaasst from the past. Wouldn’t you say so, dad?” Meili wore a shit-eating grin. 

“I get it, I get it.” 

Subaru observed Meili, remembering the times when she was still a little girl. She was still his little girl but she’s grown up. Meili was a bit taller than Emilia but she still rocked her one braid. She still had similar clothing as she did as a child, one of the ways to still be attached to Elsa. 

“Anyway, go and play with Rina and Keid. They missed you a lot.” 

“Yeah, I missed them a lot, toooo.” 

Meili ran towards her siblings and chased them with a couple of mabeasts. While Emilia and Beatrice were watching from the sides. 

“You look peaceful, I suppose.” 

“Do I? Maybe I am. Maybe I’m just glad I finally have a reality that doesn’t involve me dying.” 

“Betty is sure that she knows Subaru better than anyone, in fact, but there are some things that I will never understand.” 

Beatrice looked at Subaru like she was about to have a headache. To be fair, no one will truly understand Subaru. No one will ever know about Return By Death. No one will ever understand his pain. No one will ever understand his guilt. He would have loved to finally express what had been hurting him all this time, but it was best if he didn’t. 

Emilia wouldn’t be able to look at him the same. Beatrice would be broken. Ram and Rem would be devastated. Everyone in the mansion would be shaken to their core. His children wouldn’t know how to respond to a father that had tasted death before. 

Subaru will never tell anyone about the nightmares that haunt him, and no one will ever find out. It’s the best for everyone. 

“Subaru, are you okay?” 

“Huh?” Subaru looked behind him to see a gorgeous angel looking at him. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m just glad I was able to have a happy ending with you.” 

“Me too. I love you, Subaru.” 

“I love you, too.” 

Both Subaru and Emilia sat down, watching their children play with the mabeasts as Beatrice joined them. 

Thankful for the future that was given to them. 

A future that has a possibility of happening. 

A future that may never come to pass. 

A future that anyone could dream for. 

A future that Subaru and Emilia have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, it's been a while. It's been like what? 3 weeks? I literally wrote this chapter 10 different times, all because I didn't like what was being written. This one was just the better of the bunch I wrote and I decided to keep writing this one specifically. I think this is a good enough chapter to end this fic off with. Could I have written more? Yes. The only reason I decided to end it off here was because school is becoming a pain in the ass again and I also have other ideas to write. I already have another fic planned and it's defiantly going to be better than Future. In my opinion at least. It was fun writing Chochorina and Keid while I did because I don't think they'll be in more fics any time soon. Also Keid is a star name, if you didn't know. Anyway I hope you guy's enjoyed this fic.

**Author's Note:**

> First Fic I have ever wrote so I would appreciate any criticism. Also I'm extremely lazy so I don't have any consistencies. But I'll try and get each chapter out in reasonable times.


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